My current situation now?
Sucks~ Alot!!
Mr “T”:
Remember? The day that I got so sad coz of him?
Yeah that day~
it’s been 2 weeks since we've met! And I don't think he wants to see me ever again~
well! Let’s begin the topic here shall we?

For starters, He went out with her first!
This is an obvious sign that he still loves her.
And for heaven’s sake, the sight of love is so prominent. I mean, just look at his Friendster.
(Let me emphasize that I’m not a signage idiot)
He still refuses to let go.
I don’t want to be the 3rd party.
I don’t want to be her replacement.
And don’t keep me empty promises!
The one you really truly love is her, all along!
So I simply took the giant leap to get away from you before this situation gets more complicated.
I swore to myself, never to cry (again) for boys who are fickle and allows sweet memories of the past haunt him in the present.
Think about the future dude!
Being nostalgic does not get things done unless you’re in a retro run-way~
*Get some plastic bangles and huge hoop ear rings!*

*I bless you for your future grievances! *
Mr “Y”:
Thanks to you! I am afraid to move on!
I don’t love you anymore! But somehow I do!
But you’ve been so bitchy these few days, who cares?!
You scold me!
You lecture me!
But you care for me!
But you love me!
Urgh~ why do I even include you here?
Simply because you have impacted my life with life itself~

Mr “J”:
I’m so sorry for the->:W
But, anyway, it’s not that I accept you or anything.
You have all great qualities and values that a perfect boyfriend should have.
You are carefree, spontaneous, amiable and warm.
I would be happy to be yours. However, I can’t risk it to hurt you.
My head is in such a muddle right now.
It will be so freaking unfair to you.
A nicer way of saying this would be, I am just not ready.
You are so sweet, so caring, and so original.
I can’t bring myself to taint your pure nature.
I’m sorry.
In conclusion, I know I’ve lost a good man.

Mr “on-9-cum-rl-dear”:
I’ve never met you. How do you expect me to love you?
I’m caught in the ambiguous situation of whether to follow my heart or my curiosity.
Curiosity is the main reason I’ve accepted this relationship.
I want to know what it is like to love such a man.
Man of the age 28 with a 3 year old tantrum accompanied with 40 year old worries and 13 year old rules~
ok.
To begin with, 28 -> the age gap? “Oh my God, Don’t worry about it honey, I’m just a DECADE hotter than you” ~~ I’m afraid that problems will arise due to our generation gap.
Not to mention, we youngsters are more hip and we studied democracy, u people still in the Jihad era~ (joking!)

The tantrum-> I would be so afraid to make mistakes. You made it a challenge for me to try to be yours. Bring it on! Though I am scared, I still persist!!! I think all I ever want to do is to try to control the temper! Lol. Ok- This proves that I am so not ready to settle down!

Rules!! Dude!! Give it up on the rules part. I am not a future housewife! The only time I will be a housewife is that if I am actually a secret police agent; u know~ like the show Mr and Mrs Smith!
Anyway, just to clarify that-> I would never ever- abide by such ridiculous rules.
You know the ones like: Cannot go out with other guys.
What do you want me to say?
“Darling, miraculously my best friend is ah gua? Is it alright if I go out with him or her (whatever)?”
I will never sacrifice my friends to salvage for my relationship!
I can love you unconditionally, but, dude~ chill man... y’all go get some alcoholic drinks and stuff~

Im super stress!
Currently Single, Fallin for no one at the moment (or maybe avoiding)

T.T
my main worry is i have to move out at 21.
haiix
21?
where do i live?
with who?

I feel so insecure.
so unsafe..

I am not looking foward to my 18th birthday.
It marks a year closer to my 21st.
I don't want to grow up.

3 more years~

Where will i be?

What scares me the most is the bleak future ahead.

It seems to be thirsty to gush out and reach me..

Who can provide me with love, and a stable home?
Whoever you are, i know, that i will love you back.

Ok.
I’ve got no idea how to start this argument without sounding bias.
Hmm, ok let’s start it with.
I was sort of late for school today and everything.
Ok. Whatever, this sounds lame now.

Whoa. As everyone knows me, I am really not that “sweet-girl-next-door” kind of person.
But more of an observant, outspoken yet extrovert at times.
In a nutshell, I refuse to talk to people that don’t understand me.
If most clever people ever heard of the phrase: 知音说与知音听，不是知音莫与痰！
Yeah, means those things I wish to keep in private and tell them only to my closest buddy, I will only tell it to them. Not bitches and bastards whom ask about them randomly.

The incident happened today. I escaped Literature class with Xavier. Yeah we escaped, so what right?
I was prepared to serve detention the next day.
The utmost lame reason for the escape for me is, I’m coughing my guts out and I don’t feel like the co3 filled air is helping.
The reason for Xav’s escape is so that he can see his Yi shuai (who apparently, have no lessons today.)

But the thing is, Mrs. Catherine Wong from Millennia institute, our homeroom teacher, had to call our parents..

Get this most important information in to your heads ok?
->my sis, is like “its your responsibility”
->my mom, is like “ask your sis how she shall execute you for this CRIME” [yaya, I’m freezing right now]
->my dad is like “what in the third Reich happened?”

Xav’s mom was ok with it.

But Mrs. CATHERINE WONG FROM MILLENNIA INSTITUTE made me look bad.
She told Xav’s mom something definitely not true.
This is what she told Xav’s mom:
1. Kristal is a bad influence to Xavier. You should keep your son away from bad students.
2. Kristal is ALWAYS the one who gets Xavier into Trouble.
3. Kristal’s family background is very complex and she is complex herself.
4. Don’t let Kristal get your son into trouble. According to some of the classmates, she drags Xavier into all her problems.
Wow, I totally why MRS CATHERINE WONG from MILLENNIA INSTITUTE said such things! Let me explain why she said all those. And it is clear that Wong is just stereotyping.
• I am not a bad influence to Xavier! I ALWAYS remind him to study, to the extent; I don’t have time to study myself!
• When the fuck, did I get Xavier in trouble? Please list down below.
• So what if my family background is complex? It is so-> non-of-your-fucking-business!
MRS CATHERINE WONG, I know that you are pissed by the fact that I refuse to say anything more about my family, except the reason why I preferred to be called Kristal.
I know I don’t want to tell you!
The reason is simply because i think that such issues do not reflect on my studies do they?
I am sure that you just need a story to tell your other colleagues. WHATEVER!
And you know what? MRS CATHERINE WONG never fails to ASSUME what I am thinking.
Firstly, she would name what she thinks I thought about-
then she would ASSUME this and that happened.
Gullible! MRS WONG, I am not a book that you can read. I am not one of your fictional literature texts.
I don’t want you to know about it, doesn’t mean I have a dark secret.
It simply meant that, I don’t trust you and I want you to get out of my life other than those that involve school work.
I feel stupid that I have to tell a teacher to ACT PROFESSIONAL (when that’s her job to begin with ~)

I am sick with people telling me what the right decision is with everything~
i am sick of you losers out there..trying so hard each day to make a living yet put the blame on others.

Let me be frank for a moment!~

Firstly-
julian and yukai~
Both of u are equally as ugly
And have so much (bad) things in common
That-> no one is suprised u guys made the best buddies among each other!

In addition, u guys look so bad-
That, not only that both of u cannot make it, but ur friends around u get dumber as days pass by...
AND the reason is because they mix too much with DUMB FARKS like u !

SO-
Naturally, u should know, that both of u
Have NO RIGHTS to ask me to be ur girlfriend!!
And NO!!
i don't TAKE ORDERS from losers (neither do i to anyone else)
AND!!
Do not EXPECT me
to make a PUBLIC DECLARATION
stating that i am one of ur girlfriend!
i never was!! AND FARKING NEVER WIL BE.

In conclusion
To julian..
Get that cataracts of urs FIXED (get new EYES)
AND STARE AT THE 6-sided MAGNIFIED MIRROR!!
LOOK AT UR SELF CAREFULLY
BEFORE U FREAKING ASK ME
TO BE UR GURLFRIEND!!
And u know what?
-->STOP FLOODING MY INBOX!! I HAVE 130++ of UR FUCKING UNREAD MSGERS IN MY HANDPHONE<--

As a result,
pls critically comment on the PICTURE of julian below [[1 and a half pages ]]


Phew~ With that off my head-

NOW,
i don't know how i feel!
But i hope what i feel is not the feeling i want to feel!
i do not want to get hurt (yet again!~)

i can't sleep because of this!~
I think think think..Yet i think again!
Have i fallen for u ?
am i falling for u ?

BUT
i know...
it is not a practical decision..
Then again,
i question myself.
What is?!

My head wants me to
Stop Thinking of you
Forget u
Eradicate Your Existance in my Life

My heart wants me to
Think of you
Lock you in
Maybe even Love u
be my Pillar of support
Be my man..
And Keep me Secure in ur arms
[[Ain't that what Every girl wants?!]]

TMD-
I'm so damn moody now LAH~~
Suffering from a Fever
Clad with Problems [[fan naoT.T]]
Humped by insomnia~

i want to Rest!
I do!
But i can't close my eyes!
Because im afraid!Frightened! Frozen!
i am just unsure!!
i guess
whatever..

Cant Confide in Anyone..
I cant tell anyone ....

i feel so tainted..
weary..
stale...

To you.
i am an object

My purpose..
to give u pleasure..

My existance..
whenever u're lonely

My maintainance...(menses)
U forsake me for a week


Am i ur property?

Am i a person?

I bring u pleasure?

Am i a sex toy OR am i a Slut..?
Coz i know..
I dun earn a place in ur Heart
=)